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Parenting is often seen as an act of love and patience, a role that demands a lot in the face of life’s unpredictabilities but is admired by society. Yet, when a parent has a disability, society’s perception shifts. The admiration for parenthood becomes skepticism. Can they handle the physical demands? Will the child suffer? Who will be the “real” caretaker? These whispered doubts and misplaced concerns form an invisible wall, built by stigma and reinforced by outdated myths.
But myths crumble in the face of lived experience.
Myth #1: A disabled parent can’t meet their child’s needs
The image of parenthood often includes a physically active figure—chasing a toddler, lifting a child onto their shoulders, tying tiny shoes. When disability enters the picture, people assume that these moments are lost. But parenting is not just about physical tasks; it is about presence, love, and adaptability.
A mother with paraplegia . . . when her daughter was born, people asked, “How will you carry her?” She responded by designing a lap-friendly baby carrier and modifying her wheelchair for safe, secure transport. As her daughter grew, so did her mom’s adaptations—lowered cribs, voice-controlled devices, creative ways to play and bond. The needs of a child are met not by the ability to run but by the ability to love, nurture, and problem-solve.
Myth #2: Disabled parents rely too much on others
Society celebrates inter-dependence until it involves disability. Then, suddenly, seeking help becomes a weakness. The truth? All parents rely on support systems. Grandparents babysit. Partners share responsibilities. Friends offer advice. The difference is, disabled parents are often made to feel like their need for assistance is an inability to parent at all.
A visually impaired father . . . laughs at this assumption. “Sure, I can’t drive my son to soccer practice, but neither can parents who work late shifts or don’t own a car. We all figure it out.” He walks with his son to practice, listens to the games through the cheers of the crowd, and coaches him in ways that have nothing to do with sight—teaching him patience, creativity and strength.
Myth #3: The child will be burdened
One of the cruelest assumptions is that children of disabled parents will suffer, that they will be weighed down by responsibilities they shouldn’t have to bear. But ask those children, and they will tell you something different.
A young lady growing up with a mother who used a wheelchair . . . this meant learning early that ability is not a measure of worth. “I never saw her as ‘less than,’” she says. “She showed me how to be strong in ways people don’t always notice—through problem-solving, through never giving up, through finding joy in ways others overlook.” Children raised in diverse households don’t see their parents as burdens; they see them as role models, as individuals who navigate life differently but no less beautifully.
Myth #4: Disabled parents are an exception, not the norm
Disability is not rare. According to global statistics, millions of parents navigate disability while raising children. They are not anomalies and they are certainly not inspirations simply for existing. They are parents—changing diapers, making school lunches, arguing over bedtime routines—just like any other.
The difference is that they must constantly prove themselves in ways that other parents never have to.
Breaking the stigma, one story at a time
Every assumption about disabled parents is built on an ableist framework that prioritizes one kind of body, one kind of mind, one kind of parenting. But real-life experiences dismantle those assumptions every single day.
The truth is, disability does not define parenting ability. Creativity does. Love does. And those things exist beyond the boundaries of ability.
The next time someone wonders, “Can a disabled person really be a good parent?”—the answer is not just yes. It is a resounding, unshakable, of course!
