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YOU DID IT!
You made it through the summer of thrown-off routines and overload meltdowns. You cared for all of the needs, macgyvered medical equipment to handle the needs of summer play, and you made it to another school year!
School is just another beautiful reminder that you can do hard things. Whether you homeschool and manage all of the medical routines and educational needs throughout each day, or you’re figuring out new classrooms, IEP updates, and endless advocating – you are an absolute hero. I see you.
You do hard things – how about fun-hard?
So many parents tell me that they could never take a family vacation because it feels like one more hard thing. I would never encourage families like mine to take on hard. We’re stretched thin, “like butter scraped over too much bread.” But what if getting away is exactly what you need to fill your cup? I don’t push for moms who prefer to be at home to take on the world, but for those who feel most alive when they’re outdoors or experiencing new things it’s important not to let that piece of you die.
I’m tired of sad-hard: I want fun-hard! Travel is shown to have endless benefits for all ages – so consider it another therapy investment. You’re doing hard things every day, might as well do them somewhere stunning.
Finding fun in the chaos
The school year seems harder for making a moment, but the drain of school and therapies makes it that much more important to be able to take a breather. Take a look at the school calendar and see where you have a long weekend that could be a nice time for squeezing in an accessible beach. Make the most of fall foliage with an accessible road trip.
Consider where you’re meeting your other needs and if there’s a way to tie in some fun. We try to make a trip out of intensive PT, and Spina bifida clinic is always a mini vacation. An orthotics casting could double as a family hike on an accessible trail.
We’re taking a weekend to unwind with a fully accessible camping experience at John Dillon Park. If you need something simple and inclusive like this to start, check out this month’s Q&A column, featuring destinations that cater to people with disabilities.
Do it for the kids
I always feel a little selfish when I start planning a family trip. It is great for the kids, but I know a main driver is that it’s meeting my needs.
Aside from all of the benefits of being outdoors and discovering new places for your kids’ growth and development (I’m sure you know plenty about sacrificing for your kids’ needs, anyway), this is about how it’s good for you and for your family as a whole.
I’m willing to bet you’re not great at self care. Most disability or medical needs moms aren’t. What if I told you that’s hurting your whole family? You’ve heard the famous euphemism that you can’t pour from an empty cup? Think about that. If your cup is empty, you have nothing to give. Your family has needs, and you can best meet those needs by first meeting your own. This is the very opposite of selfish. You are putting your family first by making sure that your cup is filled.
You don’t need to justify time off from work or money spent on frivolities – these are for the health of your family in the same way that taking time off for your child’s surgery was. If it’s not in you to do this for you, do it for them.
Just breathe – you’ve earned it
Life with kids with disabilities and complex medical needs always feels like a bit of a circus, might as well take this circus on the road! A beach day won’t be what you remembered it to be, but you’ll still feel the sun on your face and the waves on your toes. The mountain trails will be shorter and you’ll be twice as tired when you get home, but the fresh air and views will breathe life into your soul. These are new adventures as a family, memories made, and moments of refresh that are nearly impossible to come by. What’s one more hard thing if it makes everything else a little easier?